Author : Marcus Engel
"Sir, would you like to buy the lady a rose?" asked the waitress. Well, maybe she was a waitress, but she'd transformed into a high-pressure salesman in the time it took her to run to the kitchen to get my side of honey mustard. My date and I were dining in an establishment where everything was served á la fried, the décor was contemporary neon and the light aroma of fragrant cancer sticks filled the air. In a word: dive. It may have been up to health codes, but there darned sure wasn't a botanist out back growing fresh varieties of roses for the patrons.I gave the "waitress" a You've gotta be kidding! look and said, "Uh, no. I'll get her a side of onion rings and she'll appreciate those a lot more." I wasn't trying to be rude, but as the wannabe florist stomped away, my courtesy faded and I decided, you know, I DO want to be rude now!I mean, talk about pressure! How does one in my position respond to that? If I say no, then I'm rejecting my date, right? If I say yes, I'm buying a crummy rose and throwing it at someone who may not want it in the first place. With that one little question, I was placed into a lose-lose situation…and I hate to lose!Ever found yourself in any sort of high-pressure situation like this? Maybe not by someone peddling flowers, but perhaps in a retail store? Or how about those lovely telemarketers who have an answer to every rejection? Have you ever been "guilted" into doing something you didn't really want to do?The truth is, when someone pressures us into anything, the natural reaction is to resist. Think about it. If a salesperson starts putting the screws to you, what do you do? Chances are, if you're anything like me, you either: 1.Get mad or 2.Decide not to buy anything. Or maybe you actually cave to the pressure of the salesperson. If that's the case, then I'll bet you also walked out of the store with your purchase, cursing yourself for falling into that trap.People have positive reactions to guidance and education, not force. If someone learns both the drawbacks and benefits to a service, product or scenario, they're more likely to feel empowered to make a decision that is right for them.From kindergarten through my freshman year of high school, I barely ever cracked open a textbook outside of school. Yes, yes, I was one of those kids who could skate by without trying and still make As and Bs. You know that old saying, If you studied, you'd be dangerous? Yeah, I heard that many, many times while my parents "suggested" I stick my nose in a book.Then came my sophomore year of high school, and Mr. Barley's geometry class. I, of course, figured that what had worked the last 10 years would work again. Wrong! First test of the year, yours truly scored a whopping 20%. Yes, 20%. Yes, out of 100%. At that moment I had to face facts. Either I was stupid, or I had to learn to study. So, I did! (Uhhh… learned to study that is, not admit I was stupid.)From that point on I don't think I ever failed another test. (Okay, okay, I don't recall failing another test, but there's a strong chance I've selectively blocked out those traumatic memories!) So, why did I ignore my parents' "suggestions" for so long, but then took it upon myself?Because its human nature. We make genuine change when we are ready. Then the action isn't half-hearted based on negative emotions, but is instead a true effort to do what we believe.Pressure is appealing to no one. Whether someone is trying to sell you an item, change your opinion or book you a first class ticket on a guilt trip, pressure simply isn't the best way to handle things. People respond best when they've been educated, empowered and respected - not pressured. The next time you're feeling forced to do something you don't really want to do, think of the rose lady. Are you being educated? Respected? Empowered? If not, remember that a rose by any other name is still nothing more than a high-pressure sales gimmick!Marcus Engel is a professional speaker/author who inspires audiences to achieve success by making intelligent choices. Blinded by a drunk driver at age 18, Marcus battled through two years of recovery and 300 hours of reconstructive facial surgery to reach his goal of returning to college. After graduating from Missouri State University in 2000, Marcus began sharing his story professionally to audiences nationwide. In 2002, Marcus founded his own publishing company with the release of his autobiography, "After This…An Inspirational Journey For All the Wrong Reasons." His messages of empowerment and motivation have been witnessed by hundreds of thousands through his keynotes, his autobiography and his monthly newsletters. Marcus Engel is a speaker, a message, a story you will never forget! Visit http://www.MarcusEngel.com for more information!
Keyword : guilt, pressure, roses, waitress, dive, geometry, class, grades, date
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